I didn't expect to get one. Well played, God.
Tuesday
So on Saturday I sold my life...nobody wanted it.
I didn't do as well as I hoped at my yardsale. My mother and my grandma, both incredibly skilled in the art of yardsaling, were quick to explain that it was because we started at 10. I know, I know, yardsales are supposed to start at some ungodly hour when even the sun is smart enough to still be in bed. I didn't think it would make that big of a difference. Obviously I was wrong.
Also, did you know that people STEAL from yard sales? Because they do, apparently. A lady bought about $30 worth of video games (which we actually gave her a deal on...) and went back to the cabinet where we had all the games and DVDs. I noticed that she picked up three seasons of Nip/Tuck and was looking at them. I looked away, and when I looked back up, she was walking to her car. I went over to the cabinet to straighten up everything after she had rooted through it, and noticed they were gone. Now, I'm always prone to believing the best in everyone. She couldn't POSSIBLY have taken them, she simply sat them down somewhere else! I told myself. And after I had tea with a unicorn and ate a cherry cupcake with some rainbows and flowers, I looked around for where she had misplaced them. They weren't there! She really HAD taken them! At this point, she had already driven down the street, so it was too late to go after them. But after a careful inventory we discovered that she had also gotten away with a Christian CD. Go figure.
Now that the yardsale is over, I'm still coming away with a bunch of stuff and a farmer's tan (alright, alright, more like a sunburn) that could rival this guy's. Ok, so that could be a bit of an exaggeration. The main point is that I have to get rid of this stuff! I got actual price quotes from moving truck companies, and when you count both the truck rental and the fuel cost, we'd be spending less if we got rid of all of our old furniture and bought new furniture at Ikea. This time, sadly, I'm not exaggerating. So we're having ANOTHER yardsale this Saturday. And this time, we're getting up while it's dark outside.
Also, did you know that people STEAL from yard sales? Because they do, apparently. A lady bought about $30 worth of video games (which we actually gave her a deal on...) and went back to the cabinet where we had all the games and DVDs. I noticed that she picked up three seasons of Nip/Tuck and was looking at them. I looked away, and when I looked back up, she was walking to her car. I went over to the cabinet to straighten up everything after she had rooted through it, and noticed they were gone. Now, I'm always prone to believing the best in everyone. She couldn't POSSIBLY have taken them, she simply sat them down somewhere else! I told myself. And after I had tea with a unicorn and ate a cherry cupcake with some rainbows and flowers, I looked around for where she had misplaced them. They weren't there! She really HAD taken them! At this point, she had already driven down the street, so it was too late to go after them. But after a careful inventory we discovered that she had also gotten away with a Christian CD. Go figure.
Now that the yardsale is over, I'm still coming away with a bunch of stuff and a farmer's tan (alright, alright, more like a sunburn) that could rival this guy's. Ok, so that could be a bit of an exaggeration. The main point is that I have to get rid of this stuff! I got actual price quotes from moving truck companies, and when you count both the truck rental and the fuel cost, we'd be spending less if we got rid of all of our old furniture and bought new furniture at Ikea. This time, sadly, I'm not exaggerating. So we're having ANOTHER yardsale this Saturday. And this time, we're getting up while it's dark outside.
Brand New Colony
Sunday
So, on Saturday, I'm selling my life.
It costs $800+ to rent a moving truck and drive across the country. $800+!!!! As my husband would say, holy balls. This would all be well and good if we were two college grads with full-time jobs and a hefty savings account, but we are, in fact, two students with part-time jobs and empty pockets. Because of our lack of funding, we are unable to rent a truck, and because we are unable to rent a truck, we have to part with a lot of our STUFF. We're having a yard-sale on Saturday.
This isn't easy for me. I keep useless things for sentimental reasons; I feel guilty parting with 3-year-old wedding gifts from people I don't even talk to, much less that little candy dish that my great aunt gave me. Besides, this is stuff that the hubs and I made our life together with. Gah, the sentimentality!
Don't get me wrong, I'm ridiculously excited about getting away from here, forging my own trail, and doing something completely different than I ever expected to do in my life. But I'm also utterly terrified. I'm throwing myself into the void of the unknown, with the hubs as my only bungee cord. God, give me strength.
This isn't easy for me. I keep useless things for sentimental reasons; I feel guilty parting with 3-year-old wedding gifts from people I don't even talk to, much less that little candy dish that my great aunt gave me. Besides, this is stuff that the hubs and I made our life together with. Gah, the sentimentality!
Don't get me wrong, I'm ridiculously excited about getting away from here, forging my own trail, and doing something completely different than I ever expected to do in my life. But I'm also utterly terrified. I'm throwing myself into the void of the unknown, with the hubs as my only bungee cord. God, give me strength.
Wednesday
Tallying my Losses and Gains
What I Will Miss About Missouri...
My family
My friends
Victoria’s Secret Store 349
My car, Molly (we’ll be taking Steve’s car, Edna, a 1998 Escort. Not sure if this is a wise decision.)
My huge apartment (and the cheap rent)
88.3 The Wind
Andy’s Frozen Custard
Gas prices
Snow
The (relative lack of) traffic
Gift Connection
Autumn drives (the colors are beautiful)
Gailey’s
The St. Louis Cardinals
The stars
The fact that I’m considered “really tiny” here; in LA, I’ll be considered relatively average.
What I won’t miss about Missouri
Humidity
Ice
Lack of things to do
Wal-Mart
Tyson chicken (I watched Food, Inc....it’s bad stuff)
Humidity
Giant, gas-guzzling trucks without mufflers
“Miss me yet?” billboards with George W. Bush pictures (no, I don’t, actually)
Lack of recycling facilities
Humidity
The plethora of country music stations
Rain
Gun stores in the mall
Being in the middle of nothing (the closest major cities are Kansas City and St. Louis, and they are both about 3 hours away)
Humidity
The vehicle decals of that stupid little boy peeing on stuff
The political close-mindedness
The ridiculous amount of bugs
Rednecks
Faux Hipsters
SEMO Times
Humidity
Tuesday
Maybe I'm crazy....
I'm in Los Angeles today: It smells like an airport runway.
Jet fuel stenches in the cabin and lights flickering at random.
I'm in Los Angeles today:
Garbage cans comprise the medians of freeways always creeping
even when the population's sleeping.
And I can't see why you'd want to live here.
I'm in Los Angeles today:
Asked a gas station employee if he ever had trouble breathing
and he said, "It varies from season to season, kid."
It's where our best are on display:
motion picture actors' houses maps are never ever current,
so save your film and fifteen dollars.
And I can't see why you'd want to live here,
Billboards reach past the tallest buildings,
"We are not perfect
but we sure try" as UV rays degrade our youth with time.
The vessel keeps pumping us through this entropic place
in the belly of the beast that is Californ-i-a,
I drank from the faucet and I kept my receipt
for when they weigh me on the way out (here nothing is free).
The Greyhounds keep coming, dumping locusts into the street
until the gutters overflow and Los Angeles thinks,
"I might explode someday soon."
It's a lovely summer's day
and I can almost see a skyline through a thickening shroud of egos.
Is this the city of angels or demons?
Here the names are what remain: stars encapsulate the gold lame
and they need constant cleaning for when the tourists begin salivating.
And I can't see why you'd want to live here.
Billboards reach past the tallest buildings,
You can't swim in a town this shallow;
you will most assuredly drown tomorrow.
(Why You'd Want to Live Here-Death Cab for Cutie)
...but I'm moving anyways.
Jet fuel stenches in the cabin and lights flickering at random.
I'm in Los Angeles today:
Garbage cans comprise the medians of freeways always creeping
even when the population's sleeping.
And I can't see why you'd want to live here.
I'm in Los Angeles today:
Asked a gas station employee if he ever had trouble breathing
and he said, "It varies from season to season, kid."
It's where our best are on display:
motion picture actors' houses maps are never ever current,
so save your film and fifteen dollars.
And I can't see why you'd want to live here,
Billboards reach past the tallest buildings,
"We are not perfect
but we sure try" as UV rays degrade our youth with time.
The vessel keeps pumping us through this entropic place
in the belly of the beast that is Californ-i-a,
I drank from the faucet and I kept my receipt
for when they weigh me on the way out (here nothing is free).
The Greyhounds keep coming, dumping locusts into the street
until the gutters overflow and Los Angeles thinks,
"I might explode someday soon."
It's a lovely summer's day
and I can almost see a skyline through a thickening shroud of egos.
Is this the city of angels or demons?
Here the names are what remain: stars encapsulate the gold lame
and they need constant cleaning for when the tourists begin salivating.
And I can't see why you'd want to live here.
Billboards reach past the tallest buildings,
You can't swim in a town this shallow;
you will most assuredly drown tomorrow.
(Why You'd Want to Live Here-Death Cab for Cutie)
...but I'm moving anyways.
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